The Healing Power of Self-Reflection
A while back, I wrote a blog detailing how people are aggravating. Shockingly, there's only been one volume so far. With that said, however, I figured that turnabout is fair play. If I'm going to point out other peoples annoying habits, tics, traits and overall obnoxious behavior, I really should be willing to point out my own.
One of a writer's best tools can be research and interview. Considering the blog topic and the fact that I would like to continue speaking to my friends and family, I opted out of this route. I really don't need to be calling up my Mom or Brother and asking them what they consider to be my worst traits. Not only would this probably lead to some sort of "discussion", Thanksgiving is only a few months away, and I'd really like to enjoy the Holiday as a family.
So, let's begin on a journey that will point out some of the flaws of this here writer. I warn you in advance, I was hard pressed to come up with this list, as my "slight quirks" are really assets hidden under flaws.
- The ever-so-slightest tendency to be just the teeniest bit overly sensitive - OK, it's true. If there was a horizontal line, with one end saying "Stone Cold" and the other extreme end being "Weeping Pile of Goo", I would certainly be much, much closer to the weeping pile of goo marker. Not that I'm a hyper-bawler or a Sad Sally, mind you, but I definitely tend to take things a little bit too much to heart. For example, my stomach starts to bubble with rumblings of potential trouble if someone doesn't answer my email or text. I automatically think I did something wrong, and that they're not answering on purpose. Because of ME. This, I have surmised, is actually a form of egotism, since I'm assuming someone is basing their communication (or lack thereof) around me. That I'm SO important in their life, they are making a point by being silent - when in reality they're just busy. See also: Overthinking Situations
- It's been said that I have no control over my facial expressions, when annoyed or disgruntled - Another truism. I try, I really do, but if someone says something that is so utterly annoying. So impossibly stupid to ignore. So without thought - then I will admit my visage goes into such contortions that would make Jim Carey green with envy. I'm not conscious of it while I'm doing it, since I can't actually see my face, but I'll take people's word for it. I have a very hard time hiding my displeasure. My face is art, really. A one-woman show of live performance art.
- There's a possibility that I MIGHT overthink situations, just a tad - Is this a flaw? I'm not sure. On one hand, over-doing ANYTHING is never a good thing. It shows lack of balance in one's life and in one's mind. On the other hand, everyone over-does SOMETHING, and since I quit smoking a few years back, I have a lot more time to kill. Then again, over thinking situations doesn't allow for a spontaneous, natural, or organic response to life. On the flip side, a lot of people don't think enough about situations, so is it really that horrible to be someone who does too much of it? See what I mean? This is my internal monologue about pretty much everything. It makes for very poor decision making skills. Or at least very poor QUICK decision making skills. See also: No Taste in Men
- Research shows that I have, on occasion, been an aggressive driver - Again. Is this a flaw? If people don't know how to drive, is that really my fault? If my middle finger happens to be scratching my head at the exact moment I'm forced to pass them on the right, isn't that just coincidence. Assertive/Aggressive - tomayto, tomahto. Why quibble over such trivial words?
- I have no taste in men - I won't even sugar coat this one with maybes or perhapses. I have horrible taste in men. Period. I never listen to my friends advice. I never listen to my Mom's advice. If you're a loser and have no intention of telling the truth 9 out of 10 times, then please forward your phone number. You are the man of my dreams.
There you have it. My flaws or "flaws", as I like to call them. Whew. Recognizing your slight imperfections is hard work. I think I'm going to go for a drive, send some texts, call some exes and think about what I've just written.
I only hope all of you can be as open and honest with your faults, as I have been able to be with mine. I hope you are able to enlighten yourself, recognize the reality of things, and appreciate the healing power of self-reflection.
With Love
Lady Butterfly
xoxo
LOL you had me smiling all the way through Karie. Great stuff as always. Are you sure we were not separated at birth.
ReplyDeleteHaha! Thanks Squid. I'm beginning to think we might have been. The thought has certainly crossed my mind xo
Deletereallly. This is inspiring. I think I will line up my family by age; gramma, then hubby, then my big boy then my little boy and then the dog and then the gerbils and then the frog. And by the time they've all had their say, I'll throw myself into the nearest body of water. Luckily, I'm a good swimmer.
ReplyDeleteYou're a brave woman, Sandra! LOL. I wouldn't DARE :)
DeleteLol this was a lot of fun to read, Karie. I think it is important for writers to know who they are good and bad, and know their limitations and flaws.
ReplyDeleteI had to take a questionnaire a few years back in work, and one of the questions was 'How do others perceive you?" and I have to be honest, that question kind of haunted me ever since. My answer was the usual BS about being trustworthy and blah blah blah, but I really wanted to write ‘You’ll have to ask them!’
I used to sit for hours thinking things over and wondering who I was, but the only answer I ever came up with was that if I was anything, I’d be the last to know.
I’m definitely on the other end of that emotional spectrum. One night me, my then girlfriend and her mother sat down to watch the then new Star Trek movie and my girlfriend’s mother was a little drunk on Pimms and turned to me and said ‘I’m not being horrible, but you kind of remind me of Spock!’ I was like ‘What is the basis of this highly illogical conclusion?’ So I guess I do kind of come across as cold.
You MUST use this Spock reference in your writing. It's just too golden to pass up! I completely agree with you on those types of work or assessment questionnaires. Firstly, it's WORK, are you really going to put a truthful flaw down, like let's say you're lazy? Those things are pointless. Now trying to come to terms with what your flaws are on your own, while admirable, is really difficult! I think I'm overly sensitive, but I'm sure someone who has felt wronged by me wouldn't characterize me as such. It's all so relative, really. We aren't one thing to all people. I don't know. I might be several people actually. Haha. Thanks for reading and your great comments!
DeleteNot that I enjoy reading about others faults, Karie, but this was an entertaining, honest and funny post. Thanks!
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for reading, Teagan! I'm glad you enjoyed it. While there's truth to it all, it's very tongue in cheek as my flaws are different depending on who you ask and what time of day it is! Lol. Thanks for your comment!
DeleteI always had a picky taste in men, but I was never impressed with guys that impressed my friends, so I kind of know how you feel. My husband is incredible now, so I guess I did something write!
ReplyDeleteBut, on a more serious note, I sometimes think writers are called to be far more introspective than the common population, meaning we're more aware of all our flaws and how they contribute, or don't contribute, to our literary success. I can appreciate a girl who at least faces this kind of thing with a sense of humor and a dose of reality, and self acceptance! Good for you.
Thanks so much Katie. I think you're on to something there! As writers we do look at things through a much more magnified lense, it's what we DO! You just made me feel a whole lot better! Thank you my dear!
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