The Cat's Meow

How My Cat Makes Me A Better Person

As I'm sure you have gathered by reading the title of my blog, I have a cat. Her given name is Dorothy, but she doesn't typically go by that. Unless she's in trouble. Then she is Dorothy Ann.

On a typical day she is Monkey Butt, Boo Boo, Love Bug, Stinky Bottoms, Brat Child, or the standard Dottie, Miss Dots, and Miss D. If she wasn't a cat who already ignored given names, I'd think I was giving her a personality complex. As it is, she's a cat. And anyone who has a cat or knows about cats, knows it doesn't really matter what they are named. They're going to do exactly as they please. When they please. Period.

I was raised with pets my entire life. There wasn't a time growing up and through my early twenties (when I moved out) that there wasn't a pet in my parents house. Dogs and cats have always been part of the family. Not "animals", but family members. My blood boils when I hear or see people treating their pet inhumanely or without any regard. If you don't have time for a pet, don't get a pet. Pets aren't meant to be luggage, pets aren't meant to be accessories, pets aren't around to get you compliments. Pets are human too. Well, sorta. Pets are better humans.

I had been out of my parents house since just before turning 23. In my head, I wasn't ever going to get a pet until I owned my own place and quit smoking. My thoughts were that if I choose to live an unhealthy lifestyle, that's my choice. I'm not bringing another being into that atmosphere. Therefore, in my head, I was never getting a pet. I had no desire to quit smoking. That is until I signed closing papers 3 days after Christmas 2010. With the flu. In a snow storm. I decided I was going to quit smoking once I had stopped vomiting, signed the papers, and boxed up the last of my belongings. I thought if the flu, the cost of the sale, and the money didn't do me in, then quitting smoking sure wasn't. I haven't smoked since. Yay me.

But I digress.

I knew in my heart that I was never going to smoke again. Not so much because of the cost to your health , but because of the cost it costs. Like moolah. And the smell. I was always the annoying smoker who hated the smell of smoke. How can you smoke for 12 years and hate the smell of smoke? Who knows, it's what makes me, me. I just knew that I was done. Plus, I wasn't about to stink up a place I just bought. So I started searching for a feline.

I spotted Dottie at the end of January 2011 on a posting from my local animal refuge (see below for website). The minute I saw her, I knew she was mine. She just had that snotty looking puss on that says, "leave me alone" and "eff off". It was all me. It was like looking in a feline mirror. If I was a cat, she is who I would be. It was instant love. Well, instant love on one end.

Dottie's Refuge Shot:

Delayed by yet another snow storm, I picked up the beautiful beast and brought her home. Oh Lord. It did not go well.

Dottie was 2 to 2 1/2 years old when I got her. Who knows what she had already been through prior to her ending up at the local animal refuge? Only thing I can say for sure is that she was cetainly someones pet at some point - because her front paws were declawed - and she had already been at one "kill" shelter before coming to the local no-kill shelter I adopted her from. With that in mind, Miss Dottie was a hissing machine that would not stop. If she dared venture out from under the bed, you were swatted, hissed at, and silenced in to submission. To say she didn't "show well" is an understatement. On the positive side, she was litter trained and ate well. She just didn't like me very much.

It took a long time to acclimate Dottie to her new environment. I sent frantic emails to my cat lover friends asking for advice, and being reassured that "she would be just fine" , "let her be". I never had a pet that was like this! My family had always adopted pets as puppies or kittens. To adopt an adult cat, with history and fears, was new to me. And to Dottie.

Fast forward through many months of learning and trial and error. Dottie and I came to an understanding. On my part: I wouldn't push her to be the cat she wasn't. On her part: I would accept that. We had reached a critical moment in our relationship. She relaxed more, I relaxed more and we became friends. I always loved her. But now I liked her.

Then I came home from work in April 2012, and the screen was popped out of the bedroom window, with Dottie no where to be found. Utter panic raced down my back in ice cold streaks. While I searched under the bed and under the dining room table, I knew she was gone. I raced down three flights of stairs to the side of the building that the bedroom window overlooked. I searched the mulch. I searched the bushes. I searched the parking lot. Nothing. She was gone.

I called my parents, and they raced over. ('Cause what 36 year old doesn't, right?) I searched high and low. Around the building, down the embankment, across the side parking lot, over the fence. Nothing. I went back to the side of the building my bedroom window overlooked and searched one last time, in vain. As I passed the last waxy bush, I heard a little "meow". I ripped through the leaves and lifted Miss Dot's out of the bush, pollen in her fur and not a broken bone on her body. I felt like I was lifting little Jessica out of the well! We had reached another level of our relationship. She trusted me and looked for me. This is big. This is huge. (PS. Took her to the vet, she was A-OK)

Fast forward to today. I've had my Dottie for well over 2 years. She has taught me a new form of patience. She has taught me a whole new degree of fear. She has taught me a higher level of companionship. She has taught me utter responsiblity. She has taught me what unconditional love actually is.

Cats might not be every person's cup of tea. I get that. A dog is much more attentive, much more appreciative and so much easier in terms of give and take. I love dogs. They greet you when you come home and they ask for nothing but love. I love pooches.

All I can say is that Miss Dottie has taught me how to be a better person, without saying a word. Except the occasional hiss :)

With Love
Lady Butterfly
xoxo


To Adopt a Pet in the local NJ/NY area, please see:  http://rbari.org/